Dani was the name I wrote on the little tag attached to the balloon before I released it into the sky. I believed my baby to be a girl. Continue reading
‘Dani’ A Chapter from Daughter Wait!
Daughter Wait!
Grief, International Pregnancy and Infant Loss: the Genesis Breath
Over the last few years, I’ve been fortunate enough to live close to the water. We see it daily. The beach, my sacred place. To look out at the horizon, watch the setting and rising sun, see the waves as they roll in, it’s mesmerising.
When I was a little girl, my dad told me that waves always come in sets of seven. He said you could count them and after the first big wave crashed, six more would follow, each losing a little power until there was a pause, stillness… Continue reading
First Kiss
I had just turned thirteen when I had my first kiss. Rory, the cute, mysterious, dark-haired boy from down the street, had been my boyfriend for a few days when our friends decided it was time we kissed.
Continue readingAbortion. Choosing to allow a life to be ripped from your body in such a humiliating way is not something your soul moves on from quickly. [Personal experience]
The first time I walked through the door of the abortion clinic was for an appointment to confirm I was pregnant. In my mind, there was no need for confirmation. Since I’d taken the test, the subtle changes in my body were haunting reminders of the secret I was hiding. A sudden thirst for soft drink, cravings for ice cream and a distaste for coffee, which had generally sustained me each day during university and long hours at work.
Continue readingWhen you find yourself exhausted, check whose lane you’re running in.
I am a writer. I have to write. When I don’t, things get messy, disoriented, clogged up and kinda foggy. Over the past few
The pang of regret: the words I wish I’d added into my book that I can’t add now.
Lately, I’ve been feeling the pang of regret. The regret stems from the fact that potentially my book had caused married hearts to wish they had something else. Despising their own marriage.
Ouch. Continue reading
Small Steps of Eternal Significance
Writing Daughter Wait! wasn’t something I intended to do. It just happened. A few years ago when I felt the prompt to start writing I began writing. Mostly I wrote messages. Writing messages became blogging and blogging turned into a love affair with words that resulted in me dreaming of one day writing a book. Continue reading
Tackling self-worth… again [Real Talk]
So here’s the thing. Writing a book, yep, it was hard. It was challenging, emotional, time-consuming and full of setbacks. But, it was nothing compared to the next bit. The bit where I have to overcome the struggle within and get the book out there. Continue reading
Sin too deep for forgiveness…
The shame, guilt and horror of what I’d done were so deep that I couldn’t deal with being present in my own life. I just watched it from a distance. I wasn’t me. At times, truckloads of emotions boiled up, and I exploded in uncontrollable crying, screaming and shouting. The outbursts lasted for hours. I was an intelligent and capable young woman yet the way I was living was incongruent with what my heart knew to be true, and it caused extreme conflict within. Continue reading
Finding peace when facing crossroads. How to be sure the next decision you make is right.
Change was imminent. As the day approached, peace diminished as every spare minute was increasingly filled with podcasts, books, questions and conversations. The hope was that in the pursuit, a particular pearl of wisdom would be discovered and administered to the growing symptoms of uncertainty. Continue reading