The shame, guilt and horror of what I’d done were so deep that I couldn’t deal with being present in my own life. I just watched it from a distance. I wasn’t me. At times, truckloads of emotions boiled up, and I exploded in uncontrollable crying, screaming and shouting. The outbursts lasted for hours. I was an intelligent and capable young woman yet the way I was living was incongruent with what my heart knew to be true, and it caused extreme conflict within. Continue reading →